Tag: Charles Kovess

Develop Great Relationships With Lovers, Family and Friends

Leave a comment

Your passion helps you have great relationships with lovers, family and friends

It seems to me that there are few things more important than relationships with lovers, family and friends.

Living your life with passion has a huge impact on your relationships.

Here are 7 key strategies to provoke your thinking on how and why this linkage between passion and relationships is so strong.

1. The willingness to be true to yourself.

Stop trying to appeal to everybody: you won’t! Yet, to whom will you appeal? This is almost impossible to answer, particularly since every person experiences life uniquely, through the filters of their subconscious minds. And it is our subconscious minds that enable us, indeed drive us, to create our beliefs and behaviors.

Therefore, the most effective strategy is to be true to your own beliefs and values, and to be true to how you wish to live your life; those with whom you come into contact can then make their own choices on whether they are attracted to you or not. You become ‘authentic’.

2. Doing the work to discover and pursue your passion.

I have been researching and speaking on the topic of passion for over 18 years, and have pursued my passions for over 50 years. What is ‘passion’? It is a source of unlimited energy from your soul, or spirit, or heart that enables you to produce extraordinary results.

When you are passionate, you immediately raise your personal energy and become far more attractive to other human beings. As the law of gravity states: the inter-attractiveness of a body to another is determined by its mass, and your passion increases your metaphysical mass. You will stand out from the crowd, and others will notice you more readily.

3. The willingness to simplify your life.

There is too much ‘stuff’’ in our lives that does not fulfill us, nurture us, or give us lasting joy.

When you discover your passion, you are more able to decide what is important to you. You can discard unnecessary complexities that you are hoarding, or pursuing, ‘just in case’ they might make you happy. Simplifying your life creates time for you to devote to your relationships that have been created because you are being true to you.

4. The willingness to be vulnerable.

I learned a long time ago that when vulnerability meets vulnerability, it creates intimacy. Intimacy is the hallmark of great relationships.

When you are vulnerable, open, honest, courageous, and true to yourself, other people are more likely to feel your essence and respond similarly Then intimacy can be created, and you need to spend less time proving your commitment to the relationships: others become less demanding because the feeling of intimacy is a powerful glue that holds the relationships.

5. Allow others to be true to themselves.

Release your need for others to behave in ways that suit you. If you are going to be true to yourself, then allow others to do the same. That way, you can more quickly decide whether you are truly attracted to another person, or whether it’s their ‘act’ that has drawn you in. Real and valuable relationships can form more quickly.

6. Adopt the concept of ‘Parallel Thinking’.

Edward de Bono’s book ‘Parallel Thinking’ beautifully explores our 3000-year tradition of Western philosophical thought that proposes there is ‘truth’ to be discovered in any issue. De Bono however says there are often times when competing ideas or thoughts can run ‘in parallel’ because there is no truth: for example, in designing a new car or a new building.

By allowing parallel thoughts to run in your relationships, you become much more flexible, leading to less conflict about what is right, wrong, true or untrue, and you become much more lovable and fun to be with.

7. The willingness to learn the principles of time management.

I have worked with many time poor executives over the past 18 years, in both corporate groups and as their executive coach. I am appalled by the quality of time management skills of most of them!

Develop your ability to protect your time and invest it in matters that are of importance to you, particularly the building of great relationships. There are many sources available to learn these skills. If you invest your time in developing these skills, you will enjoy a remarkable reduction in stress and a remarkable increase in your experience of the many joys of life.

Charles B Kovess LL.B. (Hons), LL.M., MAICD, MAITD

Australasia’s Passion Provocateur©

Certified Speaking Professional – Kovess.com

Reap Extraordinary Rewards Adding This Secret Recipe

Leave a comment

Use your passion to add value

Reap extraordinary rewards

Your passion is a source of unlimited energy. This energy comes from your soul, or spirit or heart. Every human has passion, but it appears that not many are pursuing it.

I believe that the Universe rewards us in life for the value that we add to others’ lives. The Universe clearly works according to certain scientific and predictable principles, and this is one of those principles.

This does not mean that you will not receive anything without adding value: that is a different principle at work.  For example, refugees receive assistance and support without giving anything in return.

So my challenge to you today is this: identify the value that you are adding! Investigate deeply to understand how much value you are adding,

I encourage you to start thinking about these two challenges, and then articulate your responses. When you start to understand how this universal principle works, and apply it to yourself, you will behave differently. You might ask for a pay rise, or you might even say to your employer, in your integrity, I am not adding enough value so you should either reduce my pay or increase the ways in which I can add value.

Your ability to add value is linked to your passion.

When you are passionate, you have access to amazing amounts of energy, and this energy determines your productivity. Your productivity will determine the value that you can add.

Let me share three specific simple examples of adding value:

1.    A florist who sells you flowers for a funeral for $60 is adding value to your life because she is satisfying your (non-material) desire to express your sympathy to someone who matters to you. If that desire is strong, it is clearly worth more than $60, and the florist has added value.

2.    A receptionist at a business who earns $700 per week may or may not add value. What problems does he or she solve while acting as a receptionist?

3.    As a professional speaker, when I earn $6000 for a speech, if just one member of an audience who is a salesperson changes his or her behavior to be more passionate and more effective, the value generated for the company who paid me could easily be more than $60,000 every year thereafter!

Charles B Kovess LL.B. (Hons), LL.M., MAICD, MAITD
Australasia’s Passion Provocateur©
Certified Speaking Professional
Kovess International

Discover Your Passion: 10 More Steps

4 comments

DISCOVER YOUR PASSION:

10 MORE STEPS …

Passion is an amazing resource, that every person can access. But you do need to do more than ‘wishing and hoping’ to discover your passion.

These 10 steps are in addition to my earlier article “7 Key Steps to discover your Passion”.

Please read that article as it will be helpful to you if you have not already done so.

These 10 practical, proven and powerful steps will assist you on your journey of discovery. The more time you spend contemplating the ideas, writing down your insights, and exploring the ideas with your trusted friends, the greater will be your success!

“And the greatest success you can have”, suggested Socrates, “is to say that you examined your life and that your awareness about yourself has increased.”

The 10 Steps …

1. What are the biggest mistakes you have made in your life and what did you learn from them?

2. What are the biggest risks you have taken in your life and why did you take them? You will need to explore your thoughts and feelings as they were at that time.

3. Who do you admire and why do you admire them?

4. If you had $20 million in the bank, what would you do with the rest of your life? Sitting about and golfing and sailing will be interesting for about 6 months – then you have to do something or you will die. Three of my friends who were all multi-millionaires at 40, retired, and then returned to the game of life and business before they were 41, risking much of what they had created up to that point in their lives. Humans are not meant to be sitting around, doing nothing.

5. From the answers so far, what have you discovered that you are good at?

6. Read books on personal development for at least one hour per day, every day! For a lengthy list of excellent choices see my book, ‘Passionate People Produce’ (Hay House).

7 Listen to audio CD’s on personal development topics on your iPod or in your car when you are traveling.

8. Take responsibility for your life: don’t play the victim / martyr game by blaming anyone for where you are now at in your life’s journey. It is so easy and seductive to play victim/martyr! You will receive sympathy, attention, and, sometimes, even financial compensation. If you want specific examples of what I mean, look at many of the subjects on television current affairs programs. Yet, playing victim is ultimately depressing, it ‘depresses’ your spirit, and you are highly unlikely to learn anything, leading to repeat the unpleasant experiences again until you learn what you need to learn.

9. Understand that you become what you think about: your thoughts create you and have created you so far. Therefore, please write out your vision of what you wish to become in 50 words or less, and then every day work to control your thinking so you focus on what you wish to be, not on the negative experiences and problems that might be filling your life. Your actions and behaviors are driven by your thoughts. What do you think about most of the time?

10. If your thoughts are too negative, or depressing, or sad, or uninspiring, and you can’t change them, get professional assistance. The best sporting stars in the world almost always have coaches, so you can get a mental coach!

I promise you that if you do the above work, the results will be remarkable.

You will discover a new you.

Charles Kovess

Kovess International

9 November 2011

“Harnessing Passion for World-Class Results!”

7 Key Steps to Help You Discover Your Passion

4 comments

Discover Your Passion

Being passionate is a wonderful place to be! Life becomes an entirely new experience.

My definition of passion is that it is a source of unlimited energy from your soul, or your spirit, or your heart that enables you to produce extraordinary results.

Most people, research shows, are not pursuing their passion or doing what they love.

When you discover your passion, you can end up doing the same work and remain in the same relationships as you are doing now, but your experience is remarkably different.

 

There are two broad avenues that are open to you:

1. Discover what you are passionate about, and then pursue that; or

2. Realize, and become highly conscious of, how your existing work and activities generate income for you that enable you to pursue your passion (such as caring for your family, or taking your annual fishing holidays, or making a contribution to your community). I promise that your passion for your current work will rise dramatically.

 

7 Key Steps

Here are 7 key steps that I guarantee will have an impact in helping you to discover your passion. I have developed these key steps from my work over the past 18 years in my role as Australasia’s Passion Provocateur ©. I will share additional steps in a future blog.

I confidently predict that you won’t like some of these.

That’s why I’m Australasia’s Passion Provocateur: I provoke. You can’t get ‘un-lost’ by doing what you’ve always done! And what you have done so far is what you have become comfortable doing.

 

You need to get out of your comfort zone.

Step 1. You need to be willing to work at the problem.

Most people are not interested in working, they just want a quick fix. There is no quick fix. I’m not interested in helping people who just want a quick fix. Tackle the problem as if it’s the most important thing in the world, because in my opinion it is the most important thing in your whole world. Remember my definition of passion: ‘an unlimited source of energy from your soul, or your spirit, or your heart that enables you to generate extra-ordinary results’. This is your soul’s journey, to discover your passion! What is more important than this?

Step 2. Review your life from your earliest conscious memories and consider, THEN WRITE, the answers to these questions:

a. When did I have lots of fun?

b. What spontaneously aroused my interest?

c. What upset me? What made me angry?

d. What am I most proud of that I have achieved so far?

e. Who are my friends and what is it about them that attracts me?

f. What did I dream my life would be?

g. What do I fear?

Step 3. What are your personal values? What behaviors do you wish to exhibit?

Step 4. What do you believe about yourself, both positive and negative? Write these out.

Step 5. What do you believe about the world and the role of human beings on the planet? Write these out.

Step 6. What do you believe about money? Are these beliefs useful or not for you?

NOTE: None of your beliefs are TRUTH: it is true you believe them, but they are not truth. You can change any beliefs that don’t serve you.

Step 7. Write a list of goals that would be of interest for you to achieve in the next 20 years. These will be short-term (1 month – 2 years), medium-term (2-5 years), and long-term. These goals include mental goals, physical goals and spiritual goals. They include experiences you would like to have.

 

I promise you that if you do the above work, the results will be remarkable.

You will discover a new you. You will gain insights into your soul’s journey and your true passions.

Charles Kovess

Kovess International

“Harnessing Passion for World-Class Results!”

1 2 3